QSI welcomes three new faces to our team.

Christy Ricketts joins us as an Account Executive. Christy started her marketing and sales career with Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus in Atlanta as a circus promoter. After two years, she was promoted and moved to Dallas to handle the Houston, San Antonio and Tulsa markets. In 2002, Christy became the Director of Marketing for American Airlines Center (where she hired QSI to design their new website and custom CMS). For 7 years she managed print, digital and broadcast marketing campaigns for all non-team events as well as marketing for the arena.  Most recently, Christy has been working for Servant Remodeling managing their marketing efforts while raising her two young children.

Scott Denson joins our programming team. We’re excited about the skills Scott brings to our clients. Prior to joining QSI, Scott worked with iClassPro, Inc. in Longview, developing web applications. He’s a graduate from the University of Texas at Dallas.

Dustin Carlson brings an expertise in CMS tools as well a programming. He’s been a web developer for 5 years and most recently worked for a Dallas-area advertising firm.

by Steve Lee, APR

She stood in front of me, tears streaming down her face, shaking and sobbing. “I just want to go home. I just want to be home.”

At 19, in college, a long way away from home for the first time and facing finals week. The pressure is intense. So much so that even the strongest students show strain from missed sleep and stress.

All I wanted to do was hug her and tell her that it would be OK and that she would come through this and be alright and that she would be back home again very soon. I almost did, but instead I kept a respectful distance, looked her in the eyes and spoke reassuring words as softly as I could. It would have been so much more human, so much warmer and probably more effective if I could just hold her hand. But not in today’s world, and that’s just sad.

I’m 59 years old and she was 19, two years younger than my youngest child and six years younger than my own daughter. Impropriety would never enter my mind, ever, just the need to comfort someone who was clearly hurting.

Throughout my personal and professional lives, I have never shied away from touching another person, male or female, young or old when they appeared in need. It is not a big deal, and means little more than a human connection. It’s what we do in our family, at our church and with our friends.

When I coached baseball, I was always cautious about how we touched our young players, even when showing them techniques for fielding, batting and throwing. But if a boy needed a hug, it was always there and we were very public and open. As the boys grew, those hugs remained until today it’s a casual part of our greeting.

Now, in my second professional life as a professor at Southern Methodist University, I feel uncertain and unsure. I spent the first semester of teaching observing many things, including the lack of public human contact. Oh I saw students touching students and other professors, but it seemed reserved for those who had known each other for years and built a trust and understanding. I’m new and spent only months with my students before we had to part for the summer break.

Stress and pressure are simply a part of life. Just like I described above with students, I’ve seen the same powerful distress occur with professionals, young and old, novice and seasoned, male and female. After 37 years in business, I’ve come close to that point myself more than a few times. Life can sometimes be hard and it shows up in the workplace when the pressure mounts.

If someone in our office came to me in obvious pain, and it has happened, I would not hesitate to reach out and hug my associate, my client or my friend. The gesture of open arms is automatic and meant to convey comfort and empathy. But you have to be clear about your own feelings, and very aware of how the other person reacts to the advance. If a person shies away or recoils, I’ll take a step back and connect with the eyes instead.

I’ve been through sexual harassment training for my coaching and in order to be near high school athletic groups. Mechanically, I know where not to touch and what signs to watch for telling me the touch is not wanted. Regardless of the dos and don’ts, whether touching is acceptable or not usually lives in the environment — the office, the classroom, the field. If the group casually touches one another then one or more will usually include the coach or teacher in this casual human connection.

At school, no one said I couldn’t touch a student, or that a student couldn’t touch me. Yet, I fear that even a simple touch may seem imposing or send the wrong message. For me it’s a cold stalemate and feels rather awkward but the dictates of the environment or the group outweighs my own way of being.

Research studies have repeatedly proven that the simple act of touching another person will result in physical benefits including slowing the heart rate, reducing blood pressure and speeding recovery from illness. Even casual online research discovered a number of stories about the power of touch and most come to the same conclusion — even the simplest touch can be soothing, calming, and healthy.

In an article for the DailyGood (Hands On Research: The Science of Touch, by Dacher Keltner](http://www.dailygood.org/view.php?sid=9), Executive Editor Dacher Keltner talks about hands as “the primary language of compassion.” Then adds, “touch is truly fundamental to human communicaiton, bonding, and health.” Even the most mundane pat on the back, handshake or touch on the arm communicates from one person to another.

ABC’s Diane Sawyer in a piece for The Conversation pointed out a study where 70% of strangers could communicate emotion with one another through nothing more than a touch. The same study also found that touch is a powerful way to communicate emotion.

In the New York Times article, “Evidence That Little Touches Do Mean So Much,” (http://www.nytimes.com/2010/02/23/health/23mind.html) Benedict Carey writes, “Touching eases pain, lessens anxiety, softens the blows of life, generates hope and has the power to heal. In fact, modern psychology and medicine are confirming what mothers across the centuries have untuitively known–namely, the healing power of touch.”

“People who are more comfortable with touch are less afraid and less suspicious of other people’s motives and intentions,” says Stephen Thayer, professor of psychology at the City University of New York. “They tend to have less anxiety and tension in their everyday lives.”

Going one step farther, Victor M. Parachin in a blog titled “The healing power of touch,” tells of the near miracle results touch has on patients. Parachin goes on to offer these tips “kiss your spouse when leaving for work, embrace your friends when greeting them, hug your children when they return from school and hold hands with your significant other when you are watching television.”

So why am I covering this topic? In a “connected” world, where the connection is more digital than human, I don’t want us to lose the importance of simple touches – the hand, the arm, a hug – when a person is in need. One touch can soothe, comfort and communicate genuine caring in a way words never can. Yet it also requires careful discretion. Touch softly but only if the other person appears comforted. Any other reaction is probably a sign that your touch is intrusive and distressful.

May all the good news you hear be true.
steve